Experiment Gone Wrong

I was sitting at the dinner table staring across at my son's shirt, analyzing what appeared to be two tears. Hmmmm. I looked closer. Those look like scissor cuts to me.

"Vinny why did you cut your shirt with scissors, today?" I ask. My interrogation questions get right to the point. I prefer the truth straight, no chaser, please.



"Well this cut," he says pointing to the one on the neck line, "was to let some sun in. This cut," he says pointing to the cut in the middle of shirt, "was to put something in."

"You mean like a pocket?" I ask starting to bubble.

"Yeah," he says.

"Well, did it work?" I ask curious.

"No," he says disappointed.

"Do you really want to buy your own clothes?" I ask. "Of course you don't. Did you know holes in clothing get bigger when you wash them."

"They do?" he asks in genuine surprise. "I'm sorry I won't do it again."

I'm sure if the shirt had a few stains on it, or was worn out, the scissor experiment wouldn't have been so irritating. But, it was a good shirt. It fit. There weren't even any tiny pinholes on the cotton cadaver.