Miracles

We played in the sand.

We watched the moon rise.

And the sunset.

It. Was. Freezing.

"Brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!"

And on the way home, we got stuck in traffic.

Pepe Le Pew Returns, Again

Yes, the skunk is back. But this time he didn't bother spraying the dog. Apparently, the dog is now small time to Pepe Le Pew. Oh yeah, the skunk is moving on to spraying bigger and better things, such as the entire perimeter of the house.

Not only can I smell the skunky aroma strongly when I'm outside, but I can smell it nearly as much when I'm inside the house, too. Yay! That's just like getting two for the price of one, a twofer, with a terrible return policy, twoferterrible. :(

Excuse me while I vomit from the nauseating odor.

"Wretch, wretch, wreeeeetch!"

Hmmmmmmm, that's not better?

Anyways, Stefan went to the store to pick up a trillion mothballs, which are now scattered throughout the yard. I was told by a friend skunks don't like mothballs, and will immediately pack their bags, when mothballs invade their "home." That's karma Mr. Skunk.

Oh and, Mark, thanks for the hot mothball tip. Too bad we didn't employ it sooner. The smell was the reminder we needed, I guess.

It better work, for the skunk's sake, anyways. All is fair, in a war on my olfactory systems. Besides, I really don't want to call the weird, animal ornamented, pest remover, van guy, if I don't have to.

I wonder if Nature's Miracle Skunk Odor Remover comes in one gallon spray containers? Or if I can, at least, buy stock in the company?

Nature's Miracle Skunk Odor Remover

Nadia the Dog, suspiciously resembling
the markings of her perpetrator(s).

Skunked Part 2 (Part 1 click here)

Midnight Friday August August 7:

"The dog can sleep outside," I say.

"No, she can't," says Hubby. "The skunks will come back to get her."

Of course, now there's more than one skunk. Oh the poor, poor thing.

"Well, she won't smell any worse than she does right now," I say. "Leave her outside, she's a DOG."

"I saw two opossums out there this morning, if the skunks don't get her, the opossums will," says Hubby. "I'm going to give her a bath."

And he did, at 12 o'clock in the morning, on a work night. True love. How sweet. Here's what he used.

30 minutes, and three dog washes later, he comes back in with the dog, and the smell. Granted it isn't as strong, but it's there, like oxygen in the air. Am I breathing? Not at the moment.

"See it's fine," he says skunk drunk. "I can't smell a thing."

And he was right he couldn't , but I sure as H-E-double hockey sticks, could.

"That's because you've been trapped in Skundedom for the last 30 minutes, and now you have skunk oozing from your pores," I say. "It's a part of who you are now, who you will always be.

Needless to say we moved the dog's bed, to HIS side of the bed before we went to sleep.

Friday August 7 9:00 a.m.

I wake up and notice the dog does not smell like a skunk. It seems Nature's Miracle Skunk Odor Remover truly is miraculous, but takes a bit of time to eliminate all the odor.

It's totally enzymatic! The last time Nadia got sprayed by a skunk, the headache inducing, nauseating, aromatherapy lasted a year. I wish I was exaggerating.

Application Instructions:
For the record, Hubby put it on right away and straight, no chaser. In other words, her fur was dry. He let that sit on her coat for about an hour or so, reapplying the solution several times. Then he washed her three times with shampoo, without rinsing the skunk remover.

Internet I sincerely hope you never need to know this, but if you do, whoomp, there it is.