And I lived To Tell

After rescheduling my mammogram twice, I finally went last Friday. Walking into the breast care facility, I immediately felt at ease. How could I not? The place was decorated in various shades of my aura colors, yellow and purple.

I check in with the receptionist, who informs me, "We have state of the art digital mammography."

Are these mammographers, braggarts, or what?

Turns out they aren't.

Ladies, digital mammography is more accurate in detecting breast cancer. Request nothing but the best, in this case digital mammography, for your girls. Digital mammography uses lower radiation, takes better images, and can be shared more easily.

I wouldn't be surprised to learn my girls end up on flickr, an Internet photo sharing site. Just kidding. We hope.

Also, if you have breast tissue density over 50%, you should talk to your doctor about using ultrasound to check more thoroughly for breast cancer. The mammogram will detect your specific density.

After checking in, I'm shown to a dressing room, complete with a locking locker. Impressive.

I change into my purple gown, opening in the front, lock up my belongings, and Mary Mammogram takes me into the digital image processing room.

"Why are you nervous, this is a piece of cake?" she asks reassuringly.

"Uh," is all I can manage.

"Oh! says Mary Mammogram, after reading through my file. "No wonder, you're nervous this is your first time."

Yes, Mary Mammogram, you're about to digitally devirginize me with your mammography.

And I have to say, she did it gently and nicely, communicating every step of the way. She spoke in anatomical terms, which for an anatomist such as myself, is equivalent to "dirty talk."

We all know how women get "warmed up," when being talked to, and I'm certainly no exception to the rule. But she was speaking my language, Internet. How could I not succumb?

Mary Mammogram even gave my girls a soft, memory foam pillow. Now, that's some serious wining and dining.

And here's the kicker: I got to look at the digitized mammographic Pr0n, afterwards.

"Very nice," adds smooth talking Mary Mammogram.

"Oh too bad I don't have my phone, I could take pictures of the pictures," I say.

"Oh no!" shrieks Mary Mammogram. "I can't let you take pictures."

She quickly forgot, we were talking about MY BOOBS, here.

I could see I was too much for Mary Mammogram. She couldn't handle my photographic ways. Ironic, since she seemed to think nothing of photographing my girls.

Our relationship could never last, so long as she valued her photography over mine.

And like ships in the night, we parted ways. She said she'd send me a letter, in a week or so, with the results. I can't wait to see what she has to say for herself.

3 birds

Gio's first day surfing!

"Hey guys, let's go to the beach again, today!" I say enthusiastically.

"Maybe tomorrow," says Hubby.

"No thanks," says Vinny.

"Is anyone gonna be there?" asks Gio.

Well, the first two may be lost causes, but there is hope for the third to convert to a life long devotion to the Church of Surf!

I Heart Saturday Morning

The "boys" are playing Pokemon, the card game, not the video game.

I'm reading "The Girl Who Played With Fire," by Stieg Larsson, book two in the Millenium series.

The dog and cat are sunning it.

"Ah."

Perfection.

Kelly Slater Was Here

Click the pic, to see Slater's autograph.

Today, Vinny's class is going to see "The Ultimate Wave: Tahiti 3D," featuring soon to be 10x World Surfing Champ Kelly Slater, at the Imax Movie Theater. AND I GET TO GO!

Woop!

I heart field trips.

Weather Update

And six hours later there is Sun! That's the great thing about living on the coast. No matter how carpy the weather is, it can't last for long.

Some days, we even go through all four seasons, twice.

Put The Whiskey Down

Old Man Winter, doesn't know when to quit. Last call, dude. Seriously, it's practically summer. Go home already. K. Thanks. Bye.

Someone Has To Have A Real Job

"So, are you going surfing today?" Hubby asks me, before heading to work.

"Daaaaad," says Vinny. "That's like asking you, if you're going to work today."

Breathe In, Breathe Out

Self Portrait by the Amazing Christina Riley.

Rock Star

Yesterday, I got second place in the women's division of the 30th Annual Sunshine Freestyle Surfabout.

When Gio saw my trophy he screams, "Can I have it?"

"Sure," I say thinking I have a whole box of them somewhere.

"Forever?" he asks.

"Yep," I say.

No big deal, right?

Wrong.

Today, when it was time for school he asks, "Can I take it to school and show my friends?"

"Uh............are you sure you want to do that?" I ask. "It might get broken."

"I want to take it," he insists.

"Oh, okay," I say, hoping he'll forget it in the car.

I wasn't worried about it getting broken. I was feeling a bit shy, and I didn't want the people at school to think I put him up to it. It isn't like I'm going to go around bragging about second, I was going for first. Not that I would brag about that either.

But he was starting to remind me of my Mom.

Anyways, when we walk into class, and he runs up to a group of his friends, showing off the trophy.

"Wow, you got a trophy!" the kids exclaim.

"No, it's my Mom's!" squeals Gio.

"Cool!" shout the kids.

They were all so excited. It was awesome! Seriously, I felt like a rock star. And who knows maybe some little girl in his class will think, "Hey, I can do that, too."

Besides, I may not always be a hip Surf Mama, in my son's eyes, so I better enjoy it while it lasts. He could care less what place I got. I'm a winner in his book.

When I picked up Gio from school in the afternoon, I over heard one of the kids discussing "the trophy" with his Mom.

"That's his trophy," the Mom tells the kid.

"No, that's his Mom's trophy!" exclaims the kid.

Who knows maybe she'll start surfing, too?

Sometimes, our most important job on the planet, is to be ourselves. Okay, all the time. We don't always get to see how we inspire and impact others, but we do, everyday, all of the time, especially our children.

My prizes, not bad for for 50 minutes of surfing, eh?
There's even a spa treatment in the pile, woot!

Paradise Found

Need I say more?  Probably not.  But I will say this, it is much easier to reach this slice of heaven at low tide.  In dry clothes, anyways.

TMI

Uh..........guilty.

But don't knock it, until you try it. After all, there's no better way to warm up in the icy Pacific. Just beware of the booty juice, it's one brew of a stew.

Sunshine Freestyle Surfabout 30

Another classic Surfabout T-shirt!

It is that time of year again, surfers and surfing fans. The 30th Annual Sunshine Freestyle Surfabout is on this weekend, from sunrise to sunset Saturday and Sunday. We're setting up shop on Carmel Beach at 11th Street.

Be there or be sand free.

The Surfabout is a tradition for our local surf community. Thanks to Rob and Rich for keeping the dream alive. While the event is all about the surf contest, it's also a bit of a reunion for our surfing tribe. Or maybe it's an event that manages to bring all the smaller tribes together creating one big happy family, and that Internet, is just one barrel short of a miracle.

There's gonna be music, a treasure hunt (12 pm Saturday) for the groms (because most of us have kids now), and of course, waves (my favorite part)!

Click the link to see a complete schedule of the Sunshine Freestyle #30 Surfabout's exciting events.

And surfers remember, 15 minutes to the horn blares, does not define anyone's surfing. Even 10x World Champ Kelly Slater has bad heats. That's the way the tide turns. May the luckiest surfer win.

Anyone have picks for this year's All Around Waterman, which requires a lot of hard work and has nothing to do with luck? This specialty award requires the surfer to enter and do well in the following divisions: His/her age division in shortboard surfing, the distance paddle, open longboard, and either boogie boarding, or skim boarding.

That's no small task, believe me, I'm tired just writing about it.

Let's have some fun, y'all! See you at the beach!

They Do Listen!

"You're Mom's leaving, you better go with her," warns Gio, to the little girl.

"WHY isn't she going with her Mom?" wonders Gio annoyed. 

Now, he knows how the girl's Mom feels, as well as, every other Mother in the Universe.

Birthday Do-Over

I'm a bit late on the blog because I did a birthday do-over, and spent most of the day in church.

Happy Birthday To Me And Tina Fey

Photo by Christina "Amazing" Riley

"Happy Birthday to me and Tina Fey, Happy Birthday to me and Tina Fey, Hap..Oh hey I didn't hear you come in. You're not gonna believe what happened today, then again if you know me, I suppose you will..."

Today is a reminder why I celebrate my birthday all month long. Yeah, it wasn't the best day of my life, granted things could have been a lot, lot, worse.

I did go surfing. For about 15 minutes. Yes, I said 15 minutes, which is about half the time it takes me to me change into and out of my wetsuit. Sure, I'm slow, but only because I spf before and moisturize after.

Oh, and normally I check 3-5 times to see if I've stowed my car key, in my wetsuit key pocket. And this, Internet, is where my troubles began.

I'm not sure if I had even caught a wave, when I did my key check, pocket pat. To my horror, I did not feel the key bulging, in the pocket. I patted down my leg a little further to find the key rope dangling outside of my wetsuit, without a key.

Then I repeated my key check ritual. in case I had imagined checking for, and not finding my key. Happens all the time. But still no key.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!" I wail.

"What's wrong?" asks my Surfing Friend Forever (SFF).

"My car key isn't in my pocket, ahhhhhhhhhhh," I whine.

Thus, begins my panic. It's 10 o'clockish, and I HAVE to pick up Gio by noon. My dilemma: Is my key on the bumper? Locked in the car? Or in the Ocean!

Da Da Da!

I sort of remember checking for my key a few times, or was that yesterday? Wait I didn't surf yesterday. Maybe that was Sunday?

One bad thing about being in the moment is time blends together, and can't be broken down linearly. Read: I can't remember squat.

"So what are you doing for your birthday?" asks SFF.

"Uh, looking for my car key?" I say morosely.

"I'll go in too," she offers. "I have to find Briar. I can give you a ride to get your key." (I <3 her)

I caught a few waves, to help myself feel a bit better, and then I went in search of the key.

Not on the bumper.

"Wah!"

In the car? I hope.....

I borrow Briar's person's phone and get in touch with roadside assistance, explaining "I HAVE to pick up my son by noon."

Road side assistance rocks. Tommy Tow Truck was there in less than 30 minutes, in which I immediately proclaim, "I love you!"

Tommy Tow Truck thought that was hillarious, especially since he hadn't done anything. But he was there promptly and that's not nothing, Internet.

He opened my door in less than one minute. Once in the car, I frantically search for my keys, which were in my pocket, which is so much better than the Ocean.

"Yes!" I cheer.

None of this would have been possible without my SFF's Internet phone! Thanks Dear!

I love Internet Phones and Roadside Assistance, and I want to kiss them both on the mouth, "mwah, mwah!"

I wasn't even late to get Gio. Though I did have a back up plan. I called Gio's school and he was covered to stay for lunch and the afternoon, if necsessary.

But he was expecting me at noon. And honestly, it isn't fun getting lectured by a four-year-old.

Tomorrow: How Your Love made my birthday all better.

Come Together

On the surface, we all look different from each other. Varying shades of eye color, different skin colors, different aura colors. But we're all made of the same stuff, energy, blood, flesh and bone.

We have different preferences from the food we eat, to what we think is fun, to who we love, to the gods and goddesses we worship.

But there is one thing that we all have in common. Love. We all want to be loved for who we are. Period.

That is so simple, y'all. Yet, elusive. Instead, we focus on each other's faults, often forgetting what we see in someone else's eyes, is our own reflection.

The thing is we can't love each other until we love ourselves, first. With all of our perfect imperfections, flaws and quirks.

Embrace love, embrace yourself, heal the world.

Just for today, every time you have a negative thought about yourself (or someone else) add this phrase "__________________ I love myself completely and deeply."

For example, "even though I don't like my job, I love myself completely and deeply."

Let me know how it goes. I love feedback. Or if you need extra help shoot me an email, please. I'm here to help. It's my nature.

Shedding Kelp

Good Lourdes! I know I have been surfing a lot, lately. But I never thought I'd be sloughing off kelp in the shower. How awesome is that?!

Totally tubular!

What's Up Beaches?!

I want to go surfing and the ocean isn't cooperating.

BEACHES!!!!!!

Hubby Rocks!

Hubby is an AWESOME TEACHER! Congrats Love!!!!



I have to take a minute, in this post, to tell the Internet, Hubby is awesome. Not only did he win the "2010 Mildred Willemsen Award" for excellence in teaching, he's a freaky cool Husband, as well as, the BEST Dad in the UNIVERSE to our boys.

Most importantly, he can handle me. He doesn't run out the door screaming, anymore. There's never any guessing how I'm feeling, because I'm a direct, honest person. If I'm sad, or mad, I say it.

Many people find this terrifying. And maybe he's all "feel the fear and do it, anyways," but that's okay with me. He even allows himself to get mad back, now. I'm so proud of him.

When I'm in a tizzy, he always makes me laugh, most of the time. I can be myself with him, and he really gets me.

He understands surfing isn't just fun for me. Surfing is something I NEED to do everyday, as the ocean allows. The salt water cleanses my aura. Being in the water, allows me to expand, daydream and meditate.

True we aren't perfect. But who needs perfect? I just need happy. Marriage is a work in progress, and we are always "working on it." If you know me, you know that is no walk in the park. It's more like paddling out in frigid water, duck-diving a thousand pounding waves, before ever catching a ride. Sounds fun to me.

Today, is Friday, and Friday means I don't have to wake up at 6a.m. to make lunch and breakfast, like I do Monday through Thursday.

Hubby and Vinny go out to breakfast with a group of teachers every Friday. Yay, for me, ooops, I mean them.

Anyways, I do have one requirement that must be fulfilled by Hubby, before I rise from bed to make the first two meals of the day.

I. Won't. Get. Out. Of. Bed. Until. The. Coffee. Alarm. Goes. "BEEP. BEEP. BEEP."

And I don't even have to remind him to make coffee, anymore.

It is just easier to get out of bed at 6 a.m. when I know the coffee is ready for consumption. More importantly, it allows me to have Hubby and Vinny out the door by 7a.m.

My point here is that, even though Friday is my "day off," Hubby still makes coffee for me. And he still manages to be out the door around six-ish. It is a small act of kindness, but a huge to deal to me.

The little things in life make all the difference for me, and of course, so does the sex.

I heart him.

Mammogram

Okay guys maybe you don't want to read this post, cause it is about my boobs. And well, the twins, yes they're fraternally identical, I think????

Anyways, the kittens belong to Hubby, and he went to West Point, so I think you get my point here (He will open a can of woop butt on anyone who so much as thinks about thinking about the girls). Besides, this isn't twitter, where women post their bosoms for profile pictures, to raise breast cancer awareness via #boobieviewed.

I'm not that dedicated, however, I imagine the five guys who ACTUALLY read (yes, I know some of you come for the pictures, and I'm okay with that) this blog just signed up for twitter, or reacitavted their accounts, if they aren't on it already.

Girls, today, I'm getting devirginized. I'm having my very first mammogram, EVER. I'm more than a little nervous. And not just from the thought of them finding cancer, or heaven forbid, expired milk in my ducts.

What has me shaking in my flip flops is the smashing parts. I have a feeling it isn't going to be good smashing, either

Wait. Maybe the guys, can relate, after all. Okay, Men, Think ball smashing, without all the pain and passing out business. Yeah, exactly, no fun. No fun at all.

Right now I could use a little support from Hubby. (Let's go see what he says.)

"Honey, I'm getting my first mammogram today," I say. "I could use some support, and I'm not talking about my bra here. I was wondering if you could go with me and hold my boob, dear?"

Kitty Insomnia

Briar Kitty on a surf check.

Perhaps, if I took Nay Nay the Cat on walks at the beach, the fresh salt air would help her sleep though the night. Then she would not wake me up at four in the morning, to show her where her food is.

Decisions

Oh the decisions a girl has to make. Which book next?

The continuing saga of dysfunctional heroine Lisbeth Salander, or the book club choice, "The Hundred Secret Senses?" Any thoughts on this matter, Internet? Thanks. :D

Betty White on Saturday Night Live

I never thought I'd have a girl crush on an 88-year-old woman, but after watching Betty White host Saturday Night Live yesterday, I do. Betty, is the oldest and funniest person ever to host SNL.

And I want to be just like her when I grow up. If I ever do grow up, that is.

Besides, I'm fairly certain, we have matching auras, so that shouldn't be hard!

If you missed Betty on SNL, watch the skits here on my blog. Betty does not disappoint, or hold back. So while she may be the same age as your granny, you may want not to watch it with her. Betty is very, very naughty.

Somehow, Betty manages to make MacGrubber funny. MacGrubber is never funny, and always annoying.

Even if you already saw it, watch it, again. And again. This should get all of us through Monday, by golly. There are 19 skits, that have tiny commercial breaks between them, so don't freak out, it's working.

Laughter is the best medicine. And Betty's doin' it right. And by the looks of it, still doin' it. Did I mention I want to be Betty White when I grop up? Cause. I. Do.

Here's the backstory:

Happy Mother's Day

A few Mama's Day gifts. Pressed flower book mark by Gio. Poem and card by Vinny

Wishing all the Mamas, especially mine, a relaxing, fun, and of course HAPPY Mother's Day!

Surf Jones

Well, it is that time of year, again. Winter is over. Pumping north west swells generated in Alaska, are done til next season. Save for the occasional freak swell that teases surfers for a day, and leave us hard up, wanting more.

"More, more, more........."

Yes, Winter is gone. Spring is here. Onshore winds, churn up, ice cold freezer water, creating junky, sloppy surf.

Yes, Spring has me praying for a "good" windswell. I'm not even surf if there is such a thing?

I feel as if I've been surfing great waves since last summer. And now not so much. Though there were those two epic days, last week....

I miss my lover. Small, short, fast waves that allow one smashing turn, if I'm lucky, are barely worth a 4 o'clock in the morning alarm. Or an hour and a half drive.

What other choice is there? It was something, tomorrow there could be nothing. No. Thing.

I'm thinking I could get a new hobby, like cleaning the house. But where's the fun in that?

On that note, I dedicate this song to my soul mate, The Ocean. I wish she'd get herself to the doctor for that much needed iron shot, and treat that anemia once and for all.

Then we'd have perfect waves, everyday. And "that's the way, uh huh, uh huh, I liiiike it, uh huh, uh huh."

Sand Play

And to think, they didn't even want to go to the beach.....of course, once they were there, they didn't want to leave, either.

On Accident?

Gio fell in a tide pool today, again. I thought it was an accident. I watched him fall in, and it looked unintentional. Though I was kind of busy digitally documenting the mishap, so I could have missed his true intention.

After falling in the water, he asked, "Mom, can I get in the water, since I'm already wet?"

And just in case he did fall in on purpose, I said, "no."

Nap Time

Gio fell asleep in the car on the way home.  It is almost six o'clock.  He is still asleep, as you can see.

If I wake him, I'm going to be watching Elmo in Grouchland, live, from the comfort of my own home.

If I let him sleep, I'm probably not going to get that second honeymoon tonight.

But maybe the glass IS half full.  Maybe this isn't a nap, afterall.  Perhaps, he's turned in for the night.

Here's to optimism, "cheers!"

We Can't ALL Come and Go By Bubble

As Elphaba (Wicked) says, "well, we can't all come and go by bubble," (to Glinda). 

That's right. Some of us must travel by broom. While others fly by the seat of their pants. I prefer a happy combination of all three.

Hitting the Bottle

Sometimes, even I need a drink......especially when Aunt Ruby arrives a week early, and in a bad mood. 

Hormones are all that's right with the world and all that's wrong with the world, at the same time.

There's a giant Hormone Battlestar Gallactica raging inside my body.
Oh well, at least there are remedies......

Say Cheese

Never underestimate the power of a smile, especially a dog's, to make you feel warm and fuzzy inside.

The View

Hubby is surfing.  Boys are digging.  And I'm reading, "The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo."

"Ah."

Life couldn't be better.  Happy Saturday. Wishing everyone peace, joy and relaxation.