Tuesday, May 31, 2011

Twin Captain's Bed

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A few weeks ago, I got Gio a new comforter for his bed, which was just a mattress on the floor.

"How do you like your new comforter? " I ask.

"I don't want it!" protests Gio.

"I only want a bed like Vinny's! If I can't have that, I don't want anything."

Good thing I can take hint. Personally, I like the spacious drawers and cabinets under the mattress. What a great use of space.

Monday, May 30, 2011

Daddy Play Dates

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8 a.m. Sunday Morning

"Where's Dad?" asks Vinny.

"He's playing disc golf," I say.

"What?" asks Vinny. "He went without me?"

"He went with his friend," I say. "Daddy needs play dates, too."

I'm sure Hubby figured since I'm benched, he best take advantage of my concussion to have a little fun of his own. What he doesn't know is that I'm doing laundry while he's gone. Ha!

15 minutes later.

"Where's Dad?" asks Gio.

"He's playing disc golf," I say.

"He went without me!" cries Gio. "Who's going to make delicious pancakes? You can't make them."

Actually, I made myself a delicious gluten free pancake using with Bisquik's Gluten - Free Pancake and Baking Mix. I have no idea why neither boys likes my pancakes.

And I really don't care, as long as it gets me out of making them. Pancakes are labor intensive. I ended up making Vinny scrambled eggs and toast.

Gio settled for French Toast, which had apparently improved since the last time I made "breakie."

"That's the best breakie I've ever had! exclaims Gio. "When's Dad coming home?"

Sunday, May 29, 2011

Sunshine Freestyle 31st Annual Surfabout

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Okay surf fans here's Sunday's schedule for the Sunshine Freestyle 31st Annual Surfabout. Yesterday, saw sunny skies generating sun burns for many. By five o'clock, however, it was raining. Go figure.

We ended up staying most of the day. I could barely walk five feet without running into old friends. Even though my head ached, being in great company made me feel so much better. I'm sure the drugs helped, too.

Good luck everyone!

Saturday, May 28, 2011

31st Annual Sunshine Freestyle Surfabout

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Click picture to ENLARGE.

Getting ready to head down to 11th Stree at Carmel Beach to watch my BFF's rip up the surf. Due to a concussion I'll be watching this year's contest from the beach. Good luck everyone.

Friday, May 27, 2011


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Hubby rocking the neck brace.

This morning I wasn't feeling better. My headache was about the same as last night. I felt nauseous. Based on some sound medical advice, I decided to go to the emergency room just to be sure my brain wasn't bleeding, and my neck vertebrae weren't fractured.

I call Hubby on the phone, "I'm not feeling better so I'm going to the emergency room."

"Do you want me to come?" asks Hubby.

"If you want," I say. But when I really thought about the question, it made me want to burst into tears.

He called back a few minutes later to say, "I got a sub, I'm on my way home."

Thank Goddess.

We got to the ER about 10:30 a.m.

"Hi, she hit her head last night and she has a concussion," says Hubby to a nurse.

"And my son is graduating from kindergarten at one o'clock, is there any way we can make it?" I say.

"I'm not sure you'll have to ask her," says the Nurse, motioning to Nurse 2.

"How are you feeling?" asks Nurse 2.

"Like I have a migraine, and I'm having waves of nausea," I say. "Do you happen to have a bucket? Also, my left arm feels kind of weird. And I need to get to my son's kindergarten graduation by one."

"I think you might make it on time to the graduation," says Nurse 2 optimistically.

But I wasn't sure I believed her because there were at least four battered, bruised and/or bleeding patients ahead of me.

Like a migraine, one of the symptoms of a concussion is light sensitivity.

"This waiting room is so bright, I feel like I'm going to throw up," I say. "I wonder if we can go into that room over there?"

"Sure, let's go," says Hubby.

But as soon as we stepped into the unlit room, the bright lights came on.

"Ugh," I moan. "I'm turning them off."

"You can't turn them off," says Hubby.

But I could and I did. Thank Goddess.

About ten minutes later Nurse Dude called my name to be seen by an ER Doc. Internet, you'll never guess who we ran into there. Yes, that's exactly right! The ER Doc who was on call when Vinny had his Appendicitis/Abscess episodes.

How did you know?!

Dr. Sam I am, is not only Vinny's ER Doc, but he also happens to be a surfer. I've surfed with him a couple of times since the Appendicitis/Abscess episodes.

"Hey, what are you doing here?" asks Dr. Sam I am.

"Oh, I hit my head surfing," I say, as I'm being led to Room 007. "Come see me. I have to be at my younger son's kindergarten graduation by one.

"I'll be right there," says Dr. Sam I Am.

And this is where I'm not sure if it pays more to surf, or go to the ER regularly. Though I'm pretty sure that going to the ER doesn't pay, as this visit is going cost us at least two grand. Double ugh.

But two grand is better than dying in my sleep from a bleeding brain, I suppose. Especially since I have two young children I don't want ending up like characters in a Disney movie.

Why does the Mom always die, Walt, why?

"Hey that last time we surfed together was pretty fun," says Dr. Sam I Am, entering the room. "She was ripping! She surfs really good."

"Yeah, I know," says Hubby, used to people being surprised by this.

Dr. Sam I Am concluded from my symptoms that I should have xrays and a CT scan.

"If you get a scan you have to wear a hard neck brace," says Dr. Sam I Am.

"Sure, no problem," I say.

And that's where the trouble began.

Enter Nurse Grumpy Pants.

"I'm here to help you get out of your clothes, and into this gown and neck brace," says Nurse Grumpy Pants.

"I can undress myself," I say, not wanting to get necked in front of her.

I have given birth twice. And, yes, I regularly, accidentally expose my butt crack at the beach, but I do have some modesty. Besides, she wasn't exactly wining and dining me.

"Do I have to take off my bra, too?" I ask.

"Yes," says Nurse Grumpy Pants, sternly.

Great. I turn my back to Nurse Grumpy Pants, slipping out of my clothes and into my gown awkwardly, somehow tying my bra and gown together. And it gets worse from here.

"Okay, I'm going to put the brace on you," says Nurse GP.

"It's putting too much pressure where I hit my head," I say taking off the brace. "It hurts."

"If you don't wear the brace you could end up paralyzed," says Nurse GP.

"I'll take my chances," I say.

And this is where it gets better.

"Fine," says Nurse Grumpy Pants, who turned and left the room, never to be seen again.

Everyone else was really nice. Even Nurse Dude, who came in to tell me stories about how people who didn't wear the brace ended up paralyzed.

"No thanks," I say.

Maybe they should have given me a neck brace that wasn't made for a petite giant.

The CT scans were kind of intense, but they were over pretty quickly. Though I had to keep my eyes closed and repeatedly count backwards from ten to prevent claustrophobia from taking over my body and bolting out of the oversized spaceship like camera.

Though I half expected to be on another planet, or at the very least, the exit door when the USS CT Scan ride came to a complete stop.

The xrays, went a little better, but I think I got a few xtra doses of radiation, due to a blurry snapshot or two. Rats, I should have had Xray Tech Guy go ahead and do my mammogram, too. It's that time of year, again. Could have saved myself a trip.

Once all the picture taking was complete, Hubby and I went back to Room 007 where we found James Bond chatting it up with a saucy blond. And she wasn't even a nurse. They must have gotten the wrong dimension.

I know I'm a little more off track than normal, but remember Internet, I hit my head, hard.

"Everything looks good," says Dr Sam I Am, walking into the room, ten minutes later. "Looks like you're going to make it to graduation."

But all I was thinking is, "looks like I'm going to make it."

Thursday, May 26, 2011


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Oh, Internet, I hit my head surfing and it hurts.


You can say that again.



When I came up a surfer said, "Are you okay? You look like you got your bell rung."

"Yeah, I'm going in," I say, but it took me 15 minutes or so to do that.

I was doing a seemingly routine duck dive, that went seriously wrong. On a successful duck dive I would make it under the wave and come through the other side, but instead I got sucked over the falls upside down.

Think going over a waterfall upside down. Usually this isn't a problem, but apparently I was in shallow water, going backwards over the falls, on probably a head high wave, when the back of my head hit the sandy bottom.

Sand is hard y'all.

After asking me a series of questions, The Doc says, "At the very least you have a concussion, which basically feels like a migraine."

"Yeah, that's exactly how it feels," I say. "So, do you think I'll be able to surf in a contest this weekend?"

"Oh, definitely not," says The Doc.

"So, I should stay out of the water a week?" I ask.

"At the very least," says The Doc. "If your symptoms worsen, go to the emergency immediately.

If anyone needs me I'll be cuddling me with my ice pack, hopefully not in the emergency room.

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Food Should Taste Good All Natural Chips Sweet Potato

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I agree with the manufacturer.

"Food should taste good."

But, not so good that I sit in the car, eating the whole bag of chips before Hubby gets the groceries out of the car and into the house.

"Save me some," shouts Hubby, taking in another load of groceries.

"Don't worry, I knew this would happen," I say. "So, I got you your own bag."

And that worked fine for a while, but now I'm back to buying one bag and splitting it with Hubby. And by splitting I mean, I try to leave him half a bag, but it's more like a third. Or a quarter. Or maybe it's just the crumbs.

Tuesday, May 24, 2011

Dog Gets Head Stuck In Box

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Created with PicSay on my Droid

This morning I was in the garage trying to uclog the laundry sink, so I could finish washing the 50 loads of laundry my roommates generated yesterday. After toiling with my plunger to no avail, I go back into the house to find the kittens watching Nadia Dog eating out of a cereal box.

A cereal box that was on the kitchen table when I stepped into the garage.

"Hey, how come she gets cereal and we don't?" ask The Kittens. "NO FAIR!"

Fortunately, Nadia Dog didn't hear me come into the house.

"I am so taking a picture of this," I say to myself.

As I got my camera phone ready, Nadia Dog happily devoured cereal without soy milk in "Winnie The Pooh got his head stuck in the honey pot," fashion, "Nom, nom, nom........"

Then I thought, "Hey, a video would be even better!"

Unfortunately, I was on the phone with customer service and Jaimie, in customer service, was asking me something.

"Ma'am, what's your customer number?" asks Jaimie Customer Service.

"My customer number is 8675 309," I say, trying not to sing. But for some reason I can't stop thinking about Jenny. Wait, who's Jenny?

And now back to our regularly scheduled programming.

Then comes the best part, Nadia Dog realizes I am back in the kitchen.

"Help me!" begs Nadia Dog. "The kittens made me do it. They said they would push me down the stairs if I didn't."

And I almost believed Nadia Dog's story except we live in a one-story home.

Monday, May 23, 2011

Pink Eye

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"Honey, I think Vinny has pink eye," I say. "One of his friends at school has it, too."

"Hmmmmm, it is really red," says Hubby.

"You probably won't be able to go to school tomorrow," I say.

"Wait," says Vinny. "If I don't go to school, can I still go surfing?"

"No way!" says Hubby. "You can't go surfing with Pink Eye."

"Yes, you can," I say. "Saint Super Ped said surfing would help clear it up."

Later this evening.

"My eye itches," says Hubby. "I think I have Pink Eye."

"That's funny my eye feels kind of weird, too," I say. "Don't worry, Saint Super Ped said the drops would be good for the whole family."

Sunday, May 22, 2011

Happy Birthday, Again!

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"Gio do you want to go to the beach or to the birthday party?" I ask, emphasizing beach.

"I went to the beach yesterday?????" Gio ponders.  "Hmmmmmm. I think I want to go to the party."

"Are you sure?" I ask hopefully.

"Yeah!" exclaims Gio. "I want to go to the party!"


Next, I tried bribery.

"Is there anything you would rather do than go to the party?" I ask. "Or maybe something you'd like?"

"Like a Lego kit or a toy?" asks Gio.

"Sure!" I say, thinking this shady parenting technique will come back to haunt me.

"No, I would rather go to the party," says Gio.

Oh well, so much for my dastardly plan. Germin' Around, here we come!

Saturday, May 21, 2011

The End Of The World

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"Hey, did you hear some guy is claiming the end of the world is this Saturday?" asks my BFF.

"Yeah, I heard it's supposed to happen at 6 a.m.," I say. "But, please don't wake me up for it. It's Saturday and I'm sleeping in."

"Maybe it's just going to be the end of him," says my BFF.

"Probably," I say. "That or he's just be mixed up on his dates."

Friday, May 20, 2011

Water For Elephants

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My pet elephant, Canada.

Tonight my awesome and amazing BFF's took me surfing, out to dinner, then to a movie and later for tea for my birthday. I love my friends. Though when we were all still surfing at 5:30 I had my doubts that we would make dinner let alone a movie and tea.

If there's one thing I've learned from having friends with giant, glowing yellow auras is I've got to glow with the flow. I can actually do this if I haven't had too much caffeine.

At 6:55 I ask, "Uh are we still going to the movie?"

"Yeah! say the BFF's. "What time does it start?"

I thought it started at 7 but it actually started at 7:05, giving us plenty of extra time. We walked in late, which is surprising considering the previews are longer than the actual movie these days.

It was okay, cause I quickly explained what was happening in the movie. I'm psychic like that. And no I didn't read the book, of the same title, which the movie is based on.

Then suddenly, I remembered why I didn't read the book! Ahhhhhh! I brought my besties to a movie about animal and worker cruelty under the Big Tent during the depression.

What? Was? I? Thinking?

"They're never going to go to another movie with me, again. Or worse, they'll never let me pick."

I recently saw the preview for, "Water For Elephants," and was so caught up in the steamy romance between Robert Pattinson (Twilight) and Reese Witherspoon, I completely forgot about the animal torture plan.

Luckily, I can close my eyes and cover my ears, which I did through the gruesome scenes. That being said, the story is compelling, enjoyable, yet stressful. I had to keep remembering to breathe, between screams and snorts.

"Oh my gosh, I know the bad guys are going to come in, right before they do it," I shriek.

But I was wrong they came in right after they came.

"Uhhhhh, uhhhhhh, uhhhhhhh."

Reese and Robert had great on screen chemistry, but not so great that they seemed like they slept together during the making of this movie, I would guess. Though one never knows for sure, unless we're talking about Brangelina. Reese, 10 years Robert's senior had a way better body, I might add.

Score one point for the Cougars! I'm wondering if their age difference has some critics claiming the pair have no chemistry. Sounds like someone's brain needs to be rewired. Men aren't the only ones who have younger mates, Internet.

It was nice to see Robert's true skin color, which is quite lovely like the rest of him, though his biceps could use a workout. But why on Goddess's Green Earth he kept the vampire fangs to play a veternarian, I will never know. Unless, he really is a vampire?

The cinematography was awesome. Every scene looked like a perfect still picture with brilliant colors and faded backdrops. I thoroughly enjoyed the movie, though at times it felt a lot like torture, not that there's anything wrong with that.

I may have to read the book to see how well they did the movie......Unless, someone just wants to tell me in the comment box. Someone named Sara Gruen perhaps?

Thursday, May 19, 2011

The Dog Ate My Homework

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All photos by the beautiful and talented Christina Riley.

Me on my best wave tonight.

Vinny boogieing it up.

Thursday evening, 8 o'clock, Vinny and I are just getting out of our wetsuits and into our clothes.

"If you want your screen time, you better play Angry Birds on my phone, in the car, on the way home," I say.

"I can't have my screen time," says Vinny. "I haven't done my homework yet."

"What?!" I say. "Do it now. If it's not done when we get home I'm going to be in big trouble with Daddy. Then our after school surfing gig will be terminated."

Goddess knows Mommy needs surfing therapy just as much as the kid.

"I can't," says Vinny. "My hands are frozen. They won't work. I'm just going to read my book."

"What?!" I shriek. "No reading! Daddy is going to be so upset WITH ME if you haven't done your homework."

But my words fell on deaf ears, for Vinny was completely lost with Harry, Ron and Hermione somewhere in Diagon Alley.

"How many times have you read this book?"I ask rhetorically. "Too many times. Do. Your. Homework."

The kid went on reading to my annoyance.


If I hadn't taken him surfing his homework would be done and his hands wouldn't be moonlighting as popsicles. There was only one thing to do, blast the heater.

"Ah, that's better," says Vinny. "I'm starting to feel my hands. I can try to do my homework, again."

Praise the Lourdes and kiss the Goddess.

"Are you almost done?" I ask, as we pull into the driveway.

"Yeah," says Vinny.

"Okay, good finish it up in the car," I say strategically.

There's absolutely no reason unfinished homework needs to walk into the house tonight.



Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Happy Birthday To Me

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"Happy Birthday Day to me, happy birthday day to me, oh hey Internet I didn't hear you log on."

The surf probably isn't going to cooperate today, but that's okay. I got epic waves straight from the Goddess of Surf herself on Monday.


I'm not sure what I'm doing for my birthday, besides attending a party filled with 500 hundred peeps, most of whom I don't know, but who I've seen hundreds of times.

Yep, it's Open House, another invention by the Council For Cruel and Unusual Punishment For Teachers. At least give teachers the day of Open House off, since they have to work at night, showcasing sweet Little Jonny's great work.

Or even better, give them the day after Open House off, so they can sleep in. I'm not just saying that because I'm married to a teacher either.

But I digress, now where was I?

Oh yeah, "happy birthday to me, happy birthday to me."

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

Better Than YouTube

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I just spent thirty minutes writing a blog via email for tonight's post. Unfortunately, due to technical difficulties, my email hasn't yet arrived in my Blogger inbox.

"Hello GSnail, Fix it! Sincerely, Me."

I'm just going to have to settle for this cute picture Luna and Thena Mew Kittehs playing with a box. By the way, do they make chew toys for kitties. Preferrably, ones that don't resemble power cords, or ear buds?

Monday, May 16, 2011

Monkey See, Monkey Do

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I was so busy taking a picture of Athena Mew Kitteh swatting at Nadia the Dog, I didn't even notice Luna Mew Kitteh biting her sister. Obviously, the kittens are learning certain undesirable behaviors from Gio and Vinny.

Oh well, at least, sibling rivalry doesn't species discriminate.

Sunday, May 15, 2011


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Six thirty Sunday evening, a school night.

"Mommy, please take me surfing," begs Vinny.

What's a Mom to do?

"Okay, let's go," I say.

Vinny knows my weakness is surfing.

"You can't go to the beach, it's too late," says Hubby.

"Why not?" I ask. "It isn't like he has to lesson plan for tomorrow," I say.

Hubby was either to tired to argue or figured there was probably no use, anyways. So, off we went to the beach.

"It looks really fun," says Vinny, as we pull up to the beach. "Dad sure was wrong."

Actually, Hubby was right. By the time we got home, showered, and in bed, it was 10 o'clock. I suppose that makes me the bad parent. Poor Hubby.

But as one of the surfers in the water put it tonight, "No way, you're husband is stoked to be married to a bad ass."

Though I'm not sure how reassuring that is coming from a drunk person.

Saturday, May 14, 2011


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Date Night

"What do you want to do tonight?" I ask Hubby.

"Go to dinner and a movie!" says Hubby.

He picked the restaurant, so the movie was mine for the pickin'. Or so I thought.

"Let's go see, "Bridesmaids," I say.

"Is that a movie I would like?" asks Hubby.

"It's not a chick flick," I say, reading between the lines. "Besides, Kristen Wigg is in it, and you love her."

Internet, a movie with buckets, sink loads, and toilets full of potty humor, Kristen Wigg's Wonder Twins, one-eyed Jack and tea bag impersonations, is no chick flick in my book. 

It's a C-O-M-E-D-Y. And a funny one at that.

Friday, May 13, 2011


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The Water makes him wise. I hope.

Thursday, May 12, 2011

Blogger Down

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Blogger was down when I attempted to post Thursday's blog. I was really bummed. I know not publishing for one day isn't the end of the world, but I missed my daily creative endeavor. It's good for my soul. That is all.

*written Saturday morning 5-14-11

Wednesday, May 11, 2011

San Juan Bautista, California

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Inappropriate reading material.

I went on an all day field trip today with Vinny's class to San Juan Bautista.

Upon arriving at class, prior to departure, Vinny's teacher says, "here's your group of five kids and your guide to the scavenger hunt."

"Thanks," I say.

But what I was really thinking was, "holy carp!" I am not very good at reading maps, the poor kids in my group won't find anything."

However, my maps skills are better than I expected, and we managed to find everything. The kids were helpful, as were the California State Park Rangers.

Thank you!

Overall, the scavenger hunt was not only fun, but educational too.

I don't know how teachers do it all day, five days a week? I was only in charge of five kids, and I'm exhausted.

Goddess bless The Teachers!

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Cold Water Warriors

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We could have used some sun today.

Good thing the water is frigid around here, or Vinny and I would never get out of the ocean.

Today, after school we went surfing for about three hours.

"I'm so cold I can't feel my hands," says Vinny. "Can you help me get these booties off, please?"

"Sure," I manage to say through chattering teeth.

Though, after wrestling his booties off, I was certain I wouldn't have the energy to take mine off. Fortunately, I was wrong.

At 6:45ish, after we were ALMOST out of our wetsuits and into most of our clothes, my cell rings.

"Is everything okay?" asks Hubby, concern oozing from his voice.

"Yes, we're almost dressed," I say.

"Is Vinny okay?" asks Hubby. "He was in the water a long time. He must be freezing."

"He's fine," I say.

A little hypothermia, never hurt anyone. Look at me, I'm all right. Though on second thought, maybe that's what's wrong with me?

On the way home, in the car Vinny says, "the heater feels so good. I can feel my hands, again.

"Me too," I say.

"That was really fun!" says Vinny.

"It was super fun!" I agree.

Monday, May 9, 2011

The Ring

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"Wow, Gio, cool bracelet," I say.

"It's a ring," says Gio. "And if I take it off, it will electrify me.  Bzzzzzzzzz, see."

"Oh cool!" I say.

"You know who wears bracelets like that?" says Hubby. "Wonder Woman."

"It's not a bracelet, it's a ring," says Gio, oblivious to Hubby's blatant machismo.

All the while, "Macho Man," plays in my head.

One hour later.

"Were you trying to get him to take off the bracelet with the Wonder Woman comment?" I ask.

"No," says Hubby, obviously lying.

"Liar!" I shout.

"Okay, I was," Hubby admits quickly.

"You're so macho," I say.

"No I'm not," says Hubby.

"Okay, if you're not a flaming Macho Man Randy Savage, then wear a dress to school tomorrow," I dare.

"No way!" says Hubby. "But I'll wear a kilt........ to the Renaissance Fair."

He is going to look so hot! I can't wait!

Sunday, May 8, 2011

Happy Mother's Day!

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Gluten-free breakie by The Huz.

"Wahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!" screams Gio, on his fifth tantrum of the day.

"I didn't do anything!" shouts Vinny, on his way to time out.

"Raaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaalf," barfs Athena Kitteh, into my hands, which in my opinion, is better than on the white carpet, where the other two pukes piles landed.

"Happy Mother's Day!" says my Sweet Cousin on the phone. "How's it going?"

"Oh you know, it's pretty much business as usual," I say.

Saturday, May 7, 2011

Sun Love

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The Huz maybe short on sleep and alone time, but there's plenty of love and sun going around this morning.

Friday, May 6, 2011

Friday Night Foot Massage

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Thankfully, I am ending this crazy week with an awesome foot massage by Massage Master Vinny. And I don't mind repeating the phrase, "keep rubbing," every few minutes, that much.

We're trading foot massage time for me, for video game time for him. Because I'm awesome, like that.

"Keep rubbing," I say again. "What if you're video game quit playing during your game time?"

"That happened to me once," says Vinny.

"How was that?" I ask.

"It was horrible," says Vinny. "Sorry."

Thursday, May 5, 2011


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Hubby just read "Nit-Pickin'" by Nancy Van Laan and George Booth to the whole family. Good thing we ALL have a sense of humor.

"Nit-Pickin," is about this girl who gets, that which cannot be named. (LICE!)

Those creepy crawlies were multiplying in her hair lawn, they were flying planes, playing music and having picnics!
But don't worry, Internet, she gets them buggers in the end with some RID Nit Shampoo.

I almost felt sad for the lice. Not.

"Um, honey can you check my hair?" I ask. "That book made my head itchy."

Die, Nit, Die.

Wednesday, May 4, 2011

Wendysurf, Wendysurf, What Do You See?

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Harbor Seal, harbor seal what do you see? I see surfers looking at me.

Surfers, surfers what do you see? I see a Grey Whale looking at me.

Grey whale, grey whale what you see? I see dolphins looking at me.

Dolphins, dolphins what do you see? I see wendysurf looking at me.

Wendysurf, wendysurf what do you see? I see NO nits and no lice looking at me. Phew.

Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Throwing Sand

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"Vinny, stop throwing sand," I say.

"He threw it first," says Vinny.

"Gio, stop throwing sand," I repeat. "For the love of sand crabs, stop throwing sand, people."

Eventually they did stop throwing sand at each other.

"Honey, will you look at Vinny," I say annoyed. "He's throwing sand at himself. Who does that?"

Actually he was throwing sand into the wind, and the sand was blowing back into his face. Who on Goddess's green Earth likes sand in their face?

"Ahhhhhh, the sand is beating me up!" cries Vinny, having a jolly good time.

"Stop throwing sand at yourself," I say.

Monday, May 2, 2011

Do You Wanna Touch Me There Glee

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"Isn't that kind of risque for a high school?" asks my Mom.

"Yeah, but they're not really in high school, so it's okay to think they're hot," I say. "Right?"

Sunday, May 1, 2011

Beach Day

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Striped Sea Bass, it's what's for dinner.

"Get dressed, we're going to the beach," I say to the boys.

"Yeah, I can go surfing!" shouts Vinny.

"Not with that cough," I say. "You're playing on the beach today."

"Awwwwwwwww," whines Vinny.

I felt bad, especially since I was going to surf. I know how awful it feels to be landlocked. But when we left the beach, he was pretty happy.

"I didn't know I could have so much fun at the beach without surfing," says Vinny.

I'm certain he gets this from me.

Table for one.

Vinny dragging his building material.

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