Drunk Midgets

Looks like I'm the designated driver. Again.

My Little Fish

He looks happy, and that makes me happy. Life is pretty simple. When I let it be.

Long Legs

I'm sure my legs are not that long in real life.

World Peace

Maybe if we spent more time playing together and having fun, taking turns and sharing, the world might be a more peaceful place.

Playing Coy

These Koi fish are definitely hungry. And they're anything but shy.

Coastal Cleanup Day 2010

Today was an awesome day for Coastal Cleanup! The weather was tropical, with warm offshore breezes.

Though the waves could have been better. And there could have been more trash on the beach. Then there was the incessant sing song whining, "I'm bored," by the boys.

"Good, then we can do this every weekend," I say.

Talk about complaint rock. It was off the charts.

If everyone picked up a bit of trash each time they visited the beach, we'd be able to eat off the beach floor.

Goddess bless the beach.

#Fail vs #Style

Annie's Bunny Love

"Hey what's that purple box?" asks Gio, at the grocery store.  "Does that say 'bunny love?"  Daddy I gotta have some love!"

Let the marketing begin.

Gio's commentary is turning me into a conspiracy theorist. I believe the people who created Hooked On Phonics, and tell us to read to our kids fifteen minutes a day, are evil marketing geniuses.

Hooked on Phonics, shmonics. It's more like Hooked On Buying.

They don't care if our kids our educated, they just want them to make informed buying decisions. And by informed, I mean, have a preference for buying their product.

Haagen-Daz Mango Sorbet

Sssh, Internet, I know I should be cleaning the kitchen and packing tomorrow's lunches.  But all I want to do is make out with this delectable mango sorbet.  What's a girl to do?

Ring Of Fire Johnny Cash

"Is Johnny Cash still alive?" asks Vinny.

"No, he died," says Hubby.

"Well, how come you have tickets to go see him?" asks Vinny.

"That's Jonny Lang," we say laughing.

Guess Who's Five?!

Teacher Man

He never stops teaching. Not even on the weekends.

Moon Over Water

Trestles Hurley Pro 2010

How does Kelly Slater pull off this maneuver and keep the headband on at the same time?! Well, Internet, according to the surf contest commentators, he held on by his toe nails, which thankfully he didn't trim the night before.

Even I can't make that stuff up. I believe we can all agree, surfers are very creative.

The finals will be decided tomorrow. My money is on Dane Reynolds and Jordy Smith. They were ripping Trestles, which was in an ALL TIME state of perfection! Unless, they peaked early, and Slater hasn't, yet?

The NFL Sunday Night Theme Song

Hey Internet, Sugarland was on the Today Show last Friday, but I was too lazy to Tivo it. Thank goodness for YouTube.

Not only did Sugarland perform crowd favorites, "Stuck Like Glue," and "All I Wanna Do," but they also performed the NFL theme song. Yeah, I didn't even know there was an NFL theme song.

The NFL Sunday Night theme song sounds just like that song by Joan Jett, "I Hate Myself For Loving You," but with different words. And is probably representative of how some wives feel about their husbands, during Sunday Night Football.

When I take my Jennifer Nettles impersonation band on the road, I won't be singing that song. I promise.

Put That On Your Blog

"Nice, hook, mister," says Gio to himself.

And in the next breath he utters, "put that on your blog!" 

I guess that makes him a reality star of sorts. 

"Mommy's Right"

"I don't like our vacuum cleaner," I complain to Hubby.

"It's works so much better than our last one," says Hubby elated.

"Yeah, cause our last one was broken, and didn't work at all," I say. "The new one is too loud, and hard to push."

"I love it," says Hubby, taking my vacuum criticism to personally.

"You guys just have different ways," Gio interupts.

"Yeah, and Daddy's way is right!" says Hubby.

"No, Mommy's is right," says Gio. "The vacuum is too loud! It sounds like this, 'EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!'"

Manic Monday

The problem with Monday, is tomorrow is Tuesday, instead of Friday, Saturday, or Sunday.

Bomba Didda

When I look at this picture this song plays in head, "Happy trails to you, until we meet again....."

Resting My Eyes

Noticing the quiet, I went in search of Vinny, and found him sleeping with a book in his hand.

"This is only temporary," mumbles Vinny.  "I might still read.  I just need to rest my eyes."

Didn't Your Maaaam Teach You To Share?

"Humans are so rude," says one sheep to the other sheep. "They eat right in front of you without even offering a bite. Their maaaams must not teach them any manners."

Oh we try. We try.

Gio Against The Vampires

Gio's first 16 page novella, complete with best guess spelling.

"I'm going to be a famous book maker!" says Gio. "And I'm going to sell my books all over the world!"

Exer-Crutching

"Is your son okay?" my neighbor asks me concerned. "I saw him walking around with crutches the other day."

"Oh yeah," I say. "He's fine. He's just exercising."

Ghost Ship

I have salt water in my veins. No, really, Internet, I do. A few days ago, my Mom texted (she's such a techie) me the picture shown above, in today's post. It's the fishing boat that my Nanu Giovanni, my Mother's father, was fishing on the night it sunk, never to return home again, just before my Mother's 17th birthday.

It's a sad and tragic story for my family.

My Nanu's body didn't come to shore right away either, so my family kept up hope, until his body did, finally, wash a shore about a week later. Not completely intact, either.

Consequently, years later, when I was surfing, there was a fisherman lost at sea. I would be surfing, and his family would regularly visit the beach, looking for him. It was surreal. I lived my family trauma through theirs. But his body took longer to turn up, around a month or so, and I'm happy to say I wasn't the one who found him.

When his body was finally found, I could see the family was relieved to have closure, and very saddened at the same time. Much like my family must have been when they finally found my Nanu's empty shell.

That's some intense family history. I never knew my Nanu, but I am strongly connected to him through the sea. And I know he watches over me when I'm on the water, so don't worry, Mom.

However, I also think there's a connection between my Nanu and my youngest son, hence the nickname, "Gio." Whether, it's my Nanu reincarnated, or he's just one of Gio's guardian angels, doesn't really matter much to me.

It isn't just because they're both buglers, or that Gio would drink black coffee and wine if we let him. There just seems to be a little old man, stuck in my little boy's body, with some of the things that come out of his mouth.

Like the time, when he was around two-years-old and said, "I drowned in a boat!"

Yeah, that sort of sealed the deal for me. There's definitely something other-worldly going on here.

Sealedad Prison

There's always something exciting happening on the beach. Today, before I paddled out for some choice waves, I noticed a seal chillaxin' on the sand.

"Hey, did you see that seal over there?" I ask one of my surfing buddies, still on the beach.

"Yeah, don't play with him," he warns me.

Yeah right, then I offer, "darn I really wanted to take him home, so the kids could have a pet seal."

About an hour and half or so later, a crew from Marine Mammal Rescue showed up to capture the beached, possibly sickly, seal.

Suddenly, cheering erupted in the water, from the rebellious surfers.

"Run, dude, run!"

But the rescue team had a giant net and a blocking board, capturing the seal quickly. Though he put up a pretty good fight, nipping at one of his captor's bare feet.

"Aw, too bad, looks like he's going to Sealadad Prison," says a surfer dude.

Note: Our closest prison is named Soledad Prison, get it???

Outsane Asylum

If I were transported blind folded, to a school playground any where in America, without the location being disclosed to me upon arrival, I would guess I had been dropped off at an insane asylum, based soley on the sound effects alone.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!"

"Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeek!"

"Ooooouuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!"

Angry Birds

No we aren't angry birds. But we just discovered the free app on my phone, and we're huddled around it, trying to knock out the heinous, egg stealing pigs.  Even the cat wants a piece of the action.

Never heard of Angry Birds? Watch the "walkthrough" video. The cacaphony of anger is pretty funny.

(A More Real) Love Story

Dates are important, especially for couples with children! Don't know what I'm talking about? Watch the video!

Eat Pray Love

Setting: Sitting in a movie theater watching the movie adaption of the book, Eat, Pray, Love."

"Are you bored," I ask.

"Yeah," says my BFF. "Do you want to leave?"

"No, not yet," I say.

We were only in India, and that was the boring part of the book, "Eat, Pray, Love." Things had to get better in Bali, there are awesome waves there. But they never did, even great surf couldn't help that movie.

"We should have left," says my BFF. "They're wasn't even any sex, or hot guys in Italy."

"Yeah," I say.

The book was waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay better than the movie, which could be re-titled, "I should've Stayed Home and Slept For Free."

And, not that I'm a fancy dresser or anything, but the person in charge of Julia Roberts wardrobe had to be a nun. Maybe she was overcompensating for Julia's call girl attire in, "Pretty Woman?" Roberts was covered up to her neck in Bali, for Peet's Coffee!!!!

In other words, guys, this is one chick flick you'll want to skip, unless you're into nuns.

Peddle While You Tweet or Facebook

Oh em gee! I know what would be even better than peddling while tweeting or facebooking. A peddle vacuum!

"Trim the fat, while sucking up dust."