Shark Attack Aftershocks

The aftershocks following an earthquake are similar to the terror that strikes fear in the hearts of surfers after a shark attacks one of our kind. I call this Shark Attack Tremors, though I'm sure there's an official psychological diagnosis for this such as, post traumatic stress disorder, or something.

Regular surfers, such as myself suffer from Shark Attack Tremors. And if I were the only surfer suffering from Shark Attack Tremors, the anxiety wouldn't be so bad.

Yesterday, while surfing, an alarmed surfer next to me says, "What was that?!"

I look up, and about 150 feet out to sea, I see a large grey fish swimming towards us in a wave.

"Uh, that thing looked big and wide," I say nervously, getting ready to paddle for the shore. "What was it?"

"It was probably a dolphin," says the Surfer.

"Are you sure?" I ask in disbelief, wanting desperately for him to be right.

But he didn't answer me because he caught the next wave. About fifty feet away from me a dorsal fin pops out of the water.

Then I see four or five more dorsal fins, and I say, "Phew, dolphins," to myself.

But just because there are dolphins around, doesn't mean the "landlord," isn't lurking in the nearby watery depths. I sit on the inside of the surf, duck diving wave after wave, for a minute or two debating between going in or catching one last wave.

The waves weren't very good, and no waves are worth being bitten by a shark or worse so I turn around and ride the white water wall of shame in on my belly.

Unfortunately, today wasn't any better.

First I got a text message, saying "I hear it's foggy, sounds sharky to me."

"Stop," I text. I was planning on surfing.

Then right before I paddle out another surfer says, "I can't believe you're going out there by yourself after that shark attack."

There are two other people out there," I say.

"Oh, but still, you're crazy," says the Surfer.

"Thanks," I say sarcastically.

Turns out foggy, wind jumbled surf is lonely with only two other surfers. Especially when one of the other surfers is a shark attack survivor himself.

Internet, those are not good odds.

But it isn't just us regular Surfer Joes who are on hyper shark alert. Professional surfers suffer from Shark Attack Tremors, as well. Today, during a professional world tour surfing event at Ocean Beach in San Francisco a competitor paddled in with approximately five minutes left in his heat.

"I was just sitting there, and I was waiting for a wave," says Pro Surfer Dusty Payne. "It was the biggest fin I've ever seen in my life coming straight at me. The waves are terrible. I wasn't going to stay out there and get bit by a shark."

Some people on twitter seemed to think Payne saw a dolphin. But trust me it's a lot easier to say, "Oh it's just a dolphin," when standing on dry land.

"I've seen dolphins," answers Payne. "It wasn't a dolphin.".

I'm not saying it wasn't a dolphin, but I'm not saying it was. Fear plays tricks on the mind, but fear also keeps us safe. I'm with Payne. I'd rather impotently ride in on my belly than pay rent to the "landlord."