The other night while watching, "Slumdog Millionaire," I thought to myself, "my kids could be a lot more independent than they are."
I was watching the scene where the two brothers around the age of 6 or 7 learn to survive on their own as orphans in the slums of India. The things that happen to them in the movie are so intense I nearly walked away a few times. But through all the drama and trauma they survive.
Not only does the one brother, Jamal, survive, but he comes out of the slums of India with his spirit and soul intact. His character is nothing short of inspiring and heroic.
But as I watched the movie, the boys' resourcefulness at surviving, I continuously kept coming back to, "my kids are more capable than I give them credit for. My oldest son should at least be able to paint the house and build an addition by now."
Seriously though, my kids never play in front of the house unsupervised. I always worry that as a result of my hovering style of parenting my kids will lack street smarts.
Around the same time I watched "Slumdog Millionaire," I came across a blog titled, "Free Range Kids." The blog's motto is children today should have the same freedoms we had as kids.
Ironically, there is an ad on the same website for, "Free Sex Offender Search." Hmmmm? Now there is a bit of a mixed message or at least an argument against using google adsense on a blog.
Back to the issue, should my kids have the same freedoms I had as a kid in the 70s and 80s. The thought of even my oldest son riding his bike around the neighborhood nearly causes me to faint.
In fact, I'm just getting used to him riding his bike around the neighborhood when I'm with him. Yes, our family bike rides are now panic attack free. Although when my youngest is old enough to ride his bike, instead of being chauffeured in a trailer, the panic attacks may come back.
My husband and I both took plane rides alone around the ages of 9. No way would I let my kids do that.
I'm not even going to imagine my kids driving to Big Sur or San Francisco as teenagers the way I did, because my brain starts to scramble.
"The world is a dangerous place. The world is a dangerous place. The world is a dang....."
"Wait. Breathe. Get back in the body. Breathe. Okay I'm back."
While my parenting fears are at times exaggerated, they are mine. I'm aware of them.
Just as I am aware that my kids probably won't have the same freedoms either I or my husband had as children. Maybe as my children grow up, my hovering will lessen.
But our kids are getting something we didn't get as kids. Parents who like to play, as much, and sometimes more, than they do.
6 comments:
Yah man, kids do have way less freedom, a lot of parents are forcing their kids to be adults way too soon. I was watching some mini beauty queen contest where they dress their sub 5 year old girls up in frilly dresses, put fake eyelashes on them, and cake more make up on than I have ever owned in my lifetime. Who's to say that the parent who instills winning the gold metal at the olypics from age 2 onward is the only way to be successful or happy is any better? Kids just need to be kids, have fun, and enjoy their natural aptitudes and talents :) and grow up well balanced. Then they'll be able to handle all the REAL crap that comes at them when they're adults. Yah, the world is dangerous, but if they're not prepared for it, it's more dangerous.
I found your blog! And I like it! See you...
No kidding! I wish I could feel comfortable giving my kids the freedom I had when I was a kid. I'd be a wreck with worry!! Sometimes all the information we have is a bad thing... It makes us fearful.
Well Wendy, their are valid reasons why not to allow our children the freedom we had. In my opinion, their are more "crazies" out in the world because of the homormonal imbalances people are experiencing due to poor diet and toxic exposure. We worry because we can feel that the world is different from the world we lived in as children. Their has been an energy shift in conciousness and unfortunatley it's not in a positive way for some people. That's the funky energy we are picking up on. So don't stress, watching over them is the right thing to do in this day and age. Plus your kids are learning street smarts just by their daily interactions with their classmates.
Socialization is the biggest part of being out on the street and what you recognize as missing can be taught to them after school by you. The fear is that they will be impaired of their own ability to distinguish good from bad but that's were their own instinct naturally will be their for them.
i am not even commenting on this one...
Indian women are beautiful. And they have great makeup. Thanks for this post, it is very useful information for me. As gratitude, get link on Slumdog Millionaire http://file.sh/Slumdog+Millionaire+torrent.html
Post a Comment